Arsenal of Weapons - Gun Collection
Delicate Wetlands - Swamp
Undocumented Worker - Illegal Alien
Cruelty-Free Materials - Synthetic Fiber
Assault and Battery - Attitude Adjustment
Heavily Armed - Well Protected
Narrow-Minded - Righteous
Taxes or Your Fair Share - Coerced Theft
Commonsense Gun Control - Gun Confiscation Plot
Illegal Hazardous Explosives - Fireworks for Stump Removal
Nonviable Tissue Mass - Unborn Baby
Equal Access to Opportunity - Socialism
Multicultural Community - High Crime Area
Fairness or Social Progress - Marxism
Upper Class or "The Rich" - Self-Employed
Progressive, Change - Big Government Scheme
Homeless or Disadvantaged - Bums or Welfare Leeches
Sniper Rifle - Scoped Deer Rifle
Investment For The Future - Higher Taxes
Heathcare Reform - Socialized Medicine
Truants - Homeschoolers
Victim or Oppressed - Criminal or Lazy Do-For-Nothing
High Capacity Magazine - Standard Capacity Magazine
Religious Zealot - Church-Going
Reintroduced Wolves - Sheep and Deer Killers
Fair Trade Coffee - Overpriced Yuppie Coffee
Exploiters or "The Rich" - Employed or Land Owner
The Gun Lobby - NRA Members
Assault Weapon Fiscal Stimulus - Semi-Auto (Grandpas's M1 Carbine)
Same Sex Marriage - Legalized Perversion
Mandated Eco-Friendly Lighting - Chinese Mercury-Laden Light Bulbs