bjorind
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In Need of Advice
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I have been dating this girl since June of last year. She is from New Mexico and her mom is a professor at the school I go to. Her mom is looking for another job back in New Mexico and this girl has been getting distant with me and all of our friends. Yesterday she broke up with me saying she couldn't balance school and a boyfriend. I said ok and walked to my car at which point I sent her a text saying something along the lines of "sorry I wasted your time." I sent her 4 texts throughout the day trying to get her to talk to me and I called her a few times. Her phone is completely off which I understand and her mom is ignoring my calls completely. I would have thought that maybe her mom would answer the phone at least and say her daughter isn't feeling real good and to try calling a few days later. I believe her mom pushed her into this break up and is actively trying to prevent me from reconciling with or even talking to this girl. My old friends I ask what should I do? I have already determined to give her space and try to talk to her in a few days or a week or so. I really like this girl and her only flaw is being too attached to her mother. Should I just give up?
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Umlap
Title: the original d-oh-double-g
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In Need of Advice
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bjorind posted:
I have been dating this girl since June of last year. She is from New Mexico and her mom is a professor at the school I go to. Her mom is looking for another job back in New Mexico and this girl has been getting distant with me and all of our friends. Yesterday she broke up with me saying she couldn't balance school and a boyfriend. I said ok and walked to my car at which point I sent her a text saying something along the lines of "sorry I wasted your time." I sent her 4 texts throughout the day trying to get her to talk to me and I called her a few times. Her phone is completely off which I understand and her mom is ignoring my calls completely. I would have thought that maybe her mom would answer the phone at least and say her daughter isn't feeling real good and to try calling a few days later. I believe her mom pushed her into this break up and is actively trying to prevent me from reconciling with or even talking to this girl. My old friends I ask what should I do? I have already determined to give her space and try to talk to her in a few days or a week or so. I really like this girl and her only flaw is being too attached to her mother. Should I just give up?
I'm not going to try to sway you one way or another. I will only say if the mother is against you, you're not going to have much luck.
And family liking the significant other is kind of a big deal.
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bjorind
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Her mom seemed to really like me at first... this whole crap just came out of the blue on me 
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Nsaney
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http://nsaneys.blogspot.com <<<------ Motivational Pictures (Click on me: DO IT!) "Look, that rabbit's got a vicious streak a mile wide! It's a killer!" That which can be destroyed by the truth should be. -P.C. Hodgell
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bjorind
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Yeah it seems that her mom has been trying to sabotage this relationship so I'm giving her space and hoping she comes to talk to me. Its painful
And its not that her mom doesn't like me, I believe that she is seeing this as a threat to her time with her daughter.
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Nsaney
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GL man. 
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http://nsaneys.blogspot.com <<<------ Motivational Pictures (Click on me: DO IT!) "Look, that rabbit's got a vicious streak a mile wide! It's a killer!" That which can be destroyed by the truth should be. -P.C. Hodgell
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bjorind
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In Need of Advice
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I wish I had a tower to run to...
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west.side
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let it go man, even if you do somehow talk your way back into the picture is dealing with an overbearing mom for the foreseeable future something that sounds like fun to you?
Plenty of fish in the sea
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Nsaney
Title: STFU IN HERE!
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bjorind posted:
I wish I had a tower to run to...
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http://nsaneys.blogspot.com <<<------ Motivational Pictures (Click on me: DO IT!) "Look, that rabbit's got a vicious streak a mile wide! It's a killer!" That which can be destroyed by the truth should be. -P.C. Hodgell
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bjorind
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Yeah, I don't wanna deal with her mom. I really just wanna talk to her you know? And to Nsaney 
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bjorind
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So I am giving up hope on saving this relationship. She will not talk to me, she returned my Christmas gifts, only through my friends. She told them she didn't want to see me and her mom is thinking of sending her to New Mexico to stay with her sister. So I'm done with it. For someone who said they loved me this is a crappy way to treat me. Not even respect enough for me to tell me why she did what she did.
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Milkand
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i support your decision. f that noise.
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Thaag_Simmons
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Milkand posted:
i support your decision. f that noise.
This. It's one thing for her to break it off because of the circumstances, but to not give you the decency of an explanation or allow you an opportunity to ask what's going on when she supposedly cares/cared about you is another thing entirely. Even if you got back together it would be hard to not have some doubt that such an abrupt move could ever happen again.
You can always take the high road and let her know that you don't understand why the sudden reversal but if she ever decides to explain things to you you'd be willing to listen, and that you just wanted to talk to her to make sure she was OK and try and figure out what she was going through. But then don't get your hopes up or ever expect that - just be happy that it should make her feel worse about the crappy way she treated you here.
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bjorind
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Yeah, thanks Orr. I sent her a message saying as much, and I am taking the advice of a good friend. If she really loves me then she will come back, if she needed space and all that and she comes to explain it I will prolly forgive her. If we were to get back together though I have some rules I have developed that will need to be followed for the most part. If she doesn't come around then I will move on and find someone else I suppose.
I have been getting a lot of comfort in reading Heinlein's work lately, it helps a ton surprisingly.
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Bjorind 5L3 skald Bjorblade 10L5 shadowblade
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