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Boards Archive] |
Welcome to the Vault Network
forum archive.
This is not a complete archive, time didn't allot us the
opportunity to properly backup the majority of the boards
deemed "expendable". Most boards on this list have at least
20-40 pages archived (non-logged in pages, 15 topics per
page).
Popular boards may have as many as 250 pages archived at 50
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Please enjoy the archive.
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Managers, Moderators, VIP's, and regular posters.
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Topic: Mike is dead.
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Reapist
Title: Official ACF HIOFI Poster
Posts:
74,991
Registered:
Dec 20, '01
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 74,235
User ID: 559,475
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Subject:
Mike is dead.
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Two guys meet up in a bar. The first one asks, "Did your hear the news - Mike is dead??!!!"
"Woah, what the hell happened to him?"
"Well he was on his way over to my house the other day and when he arrived outside the house he didn't brake properly and boom - He hit the curb, the car flipped over and he crashed through the sunroof - Went flying through the air and smashed through my upstairs bedroom window."
"What a horrible way to die!"
"No no, he survived that, that didn't kill him at all. So, he's landed in my upstairs bedroom and he's all covered in broken glass on the floor. Then, he spots the big old antique wardrobe we have in the room and reaches up for the handle to try to pull himself up. He's just dragging himself up when bang, this massive wardrobe comes crashing down on top of him, crushing him and breaking most of his bones."
"What a way to go, that's terrible!"
"No no, that didn't kill him he survived that. He managed to get the wardrobe off him and crawls out onto the landing, he tries to pull himself up on the banister but under his weight, the banister breaks and he goes falling down on to the first floor. In mid air, all the broken banister poles spin and fall on him, pinning him to the floor, sticking right through him."
"Now that is the most unfortunate way to go!"
"No no, that didn't kill him, he even survived that. So he's on the downstairs landing, just beside the kitchen. He crawls in to the kitchen, tries to pull himself up on the stove, but reached for a big pot of boiling hot water, whoosh, the whole thing came down on him and burned most of his skin off him."
"Man, what a way to go!"
"No no, he survived that, he survived that! He's lying on the ground, covered in boiling water and he spots the phone and tries to pull himself up, to call for help, but instead he grabs the light switch and pulls the whole thing off the wall and the water and electricity didn't mix and so he got electrocuted, wallop, 10,000 volts shot through him."
"Now that is one awful way to go!"
"No no, he survived that..."
"Hold on now, just how the hell did he die?"
"I shot him!"
"You shot him? What the hell did you shoot him for?"
"He was wrecking my house."
-----signature-----
pkhere: Jebus sometimes you make my arse tired.
Referring to illegal aliens as 'immigrants' is the same as referring to shoplifters as 'shoppers' - Dorvinion
I'd feel bad for Satriani but he got himself into it. - allmightybob_MLF
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FineYoungCannibals
Title: Top of the food chain
Posts:
74,939
Registered:
Jul 14, '03
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 73,108
User ID: 822,330
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Subject:
Mike is dead.
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i thought we talked about you posting joke threads without my approval
clean out your desk, you are gone
-----signature-----
 FYC
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AkagiyamaMissile
Title: Lord of the Lactose Intolerant
Posts:
41,132
Registered:
Apr 22, '03
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 40,523
User ID: 793,759
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Subject:
Mike is dead.
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FineYoungCannibals posted:
i thought we talked about you posting joke threads without my approval
clean out your desk, you are gone
-----signature-----
Stupidity is hard to get rid of, but at least I can admit I have a problem -Mithan-
Gobble Gobble Mother******! -Thankskilling
and off course divers license don't count either this sucks balls.-FD
Bring it on like Donkey Kong
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Rodriks_Fury
Posts:
10,818
Registered:
May 30, '01
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 10,544
User ID: 134,164
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Subject:
Mike is dead.
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AkagiyamaMissile posted:
FineYoungCannibals posted:
i thought we talked about you posting joke threads without my approval
clean out your desk, you are gone
-----signature-----
Kitty Jesus shall smite you all.
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Varece
Posts:
46,015
Registered:
Jan 7, '02
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 44,985
User ID: 598,676
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Subject:
Mike is dead.
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Rodriks_Fury posted:
AkagiyamaMissile posted:
FineYoungCannibals posted:
i thought we talked about you posting joke threads without my approval
clean out your desk, you are gone
-----signature-----
I am no longer young enough to know everything Knowledge is Free  America's Libraries "You embrace that which defines you" "If you tell the truth, you don't need a good memory" We're not perfect...we're parents
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BritonGuy
Title: Serious Business
Posts:
45,939
Registered:
Mar 4, '04
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 45,256
User ID: 901,272
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Subject:
Mike is dead.
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tldl
-----signature-----
Briton Guy...persnickety...NEVER!  -Murron (truly) Hawkson is the greatest. -Hawkson Britonguy is usually right. -Onslaught on BT “Do or do not... there is no try.†- Yodazami Do you expect me to remember what I put in my mouth? -NSMachi
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Onslaught.
Title: I've always wanted a title.
Posts:
56,272
Registered:
Feb 13, '01
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 55,112
User ID: 68,094
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Subject:
Mike is dead.
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Varece posted:
Rodriks_Fury posted:
AkagiyamaMissile posted:
[quote=FineYoungCannibals]i thought we talked about you posting joke threads without my approval
clean out your desk, you are gone
[/quote]
-----signature-----
"Mmmmrmmrrrmrrmrmrrrrmrmrrmrmrmrrmrr"
-GinsuWife
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Gilligan.USCG
Title: Stuck on the Island
Posts:
35,516
Registered:
Sep 19, '01
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 34,754
User ID: 404,098
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Subject:
Mike is dead.
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>FWD
>FWD
>FWD
>FWD
>FWD
>FWD
>FWD
>FWD
>FWD
>FWD
>FWD
>FWD
>FWD
-----signature-----
www.ice9gaming.com - cs / tf2 / bf2
<3 Oregon State - CWS Winnars x2
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Mangler_SC
Title: Bellybutton Lint Collector
Posts:
62,003
Registered:
Dec 2, '03
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 61,052
User ID: 863,702
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Subject:
Mike is dead.
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Onslaught. posted:
Varece posted:
Rodriks_Fury posted:
[quote=AkagiyamaMissile][quote=FineYoungCannibals]i thought we talked about you posting joke threads without my approval
clean out your desk, you are gone
[/quote][/quote]
-----signature-----
. Mangler had an accident on the way home from the liquor store. He was run off the road and crashed into a woman's clinic. It was one giant Pabst smear. -Bou_Te . Soylent CLiKK -- It's PEEEEEOPLEEE 
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Ah-Schoo
Title: Fuzzy Caterpillar of Friendliness
Posts:
71,317
Registered:
Aug 11, '00
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 68,974
User ID: 39,247
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Subject:
Mike is dead.
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I liked it.
<COMBO BREAKER!>
-----signature-----
.
Opinion = fact. Anecdote = proof. Political label more important than either of those.
Welcome to ACF, where debate goes to die.
.
"fascist totalitarian secular progressive Zionist intellectually challenged Christian puppets." - Aerlinthina
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deadcactus
Posts:
38,266
Registered:
Dec 27, '01
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 37,437
User ID: 577,555
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Subject:
Mike is dead.
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Ah-Schoo posted:
I liked it.
<NEW COMBO?!>
-----signature-----
'member dat?
True dat.
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JD_HOGG
Posts:
19,975
Registered:
Mar 18, '08
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 19,893
User ID: 1,285,011
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Subject:
Mike is dead.
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I snickered.
-----signature-----
(none)
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winga
Title: Canadian
Posts:
29,014
Registered:
Apr 27, '01
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 28,668
User ID: 91,955
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Subject:
Mike is dead.
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Mangler_SC posted:
Onslaught. posted:
Varece posted:
[quote=Rodriks_Fury][quote=AkagiyamaMissile][quote=FineYoungCannibals]i thought we talked about you posting joke threads without my approval
clean out your desk, you are gone
[/quote][/quote][/quote]
-----signature-----
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Itab
Title: I <3 Cookies
Posts:
10,896
Registered:
Feb 20, '06
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 10,650
User ID: 1,119,910
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Subject:
Mike is dead.
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winga posted:
Mangler_SC posted:
Onslaught. posted:
[quote=Varece][quote=Rodriks_Fury][quote=AkagiyamaMissile][quote=FineYoungCannibals]i thought we talked about you posting joke threads without my approval
clean out your desk, you are gone
[/quote][/quote][/quote][/quote]
-----signature-----
I'd suck a fart out of your ass and hold it likea bong hit. --- cumbat_mage_sc Kasta Magier says, "SLEEP IN HELL NINJA BASTARDS" http://i25.tinypic.com/24b6u5v.jpg
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