Umlap
Title: the original d-oh-double-g
Posts:
32,256
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User ID: 787,813
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Questions and Answers
Example
1st Post.
A. Kestrel sleeping with Homer
2nd Post.
Q. Whats the most disturbing thing you could walk in on?
A. Handcuffs and whipcream
3rd Post.
Q. What is something you wish you could try?
A: Pork chops and applesauce.
-----signature-----
cb umlap <+1folife> reporting for duty
dogscratch
um**p
reab
all moved elsewhere
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Daimar
Title: Moderator
DAoC Knight - Generalist
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Q: what is that stench?
A: vehicular homicide.
-----signature-----
LGM Tailor x3, SC x3, AC x3, WC x3, Alch x3, Fletch http://gimpchimp.etilader.com/s.php?u=daimar babies cry a lot, but then they smile at you and you stop throwing them into the wall. - Goatstar
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Milkand
Title: Transfarmer
Posts:
35,284
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User ID: 1,033,879
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q: what's your favourite activity on a lazy sunday afternoon?
a: personally, i don't much fancy them
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Metal_Dog
Title: Merchant of Death
Posts:
14,215
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Feb 10, '05
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User ID: 1,026,808
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Q: Oh, look! We've been invited to a Fancy Dress Ball; shall we attend?
A: OMG IT'S ON FIRE!!!!!
-----signature-----
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Daimar
Title: Moderator
DAoC Knight - Generalist
Posts:
57,526
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Real Post Cnt: 47,007
User ID: 987,256
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Q: How's the puppy?
A: he's an evil munchkin.
-----signature-----
LGM Tailor x3, SC x3, AC x3, WC x3, Alch x3, Fletch http://gimpchimp.etilader.com/s.php?u=daimar babies cry a lot, but then they smile at you and you stop throwing them into the wall. - Goatstar
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Milkand
Title: Transfarmer
Posts:
35,284
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Real Post Cnt: 23,402
User ID: 1,033,879
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q: what role does warwick davis play in the next narnia film?
a: either lemonade or mountain dew
-----signature-----
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Daimar
Title: Moderator
DAoC Knight - Generalist
Posts:
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Q: what should we use to marinate the chicken?
A: Shoot him!
-----signature-----
LGM Tailor x3, SC x3, AC x3, WC x3, Alch x3, Fletch http://gimpchimp.etilader.com/s.php?u=daimar babies cry a lot, but then they smile at you and you stop throwing them into the wall. - Goatstar
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PallyDog
Title: WoW Vault Staff
Teh Pyckles!
Posts:
13,429
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Mar 4, '03
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User ID: 776,236
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Q. What do you do to a man in camo stealing your chickens?
A. It's in the refrigerator.
-----signature-----
"Pallys are simply self healing rocks." - IndridCole
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Metal_Dog
Title: Merchant of Death
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User ID: 1,026,808
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Q: What happened to my burnt puppy?
A: New York State, where gay marriage is now legal.
-----signature-----
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Daimar
Title: Moderator
DAoC Knight - Generalist
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Q: where did dad go?
A: zinc and lead.
-----signature-----
LGM Tailor x3, SC x3, AC x3, WC x3, Alch x3, Fletch http://gimpchimp.etilader.com/s.php?u=daimar babies cry a lot, but then they smile at you and you stop throwing them into the wall. - Goatstar
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GT_mrpolarbear
Title: Broverlord of the Brocean
Posts:
35,821
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User ID: 1,162,754
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Q: What are the best materials to make a fire-proof puppy outfit?
A: Flip it around and stick it in the rear.
-----signature-----
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Metal_Dog
Title: Merchant of Death
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14,215
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Real Post Cnt: 9,456
User ID: 1,026,808
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Q: Aw! My burnt puppy's head came off! What should I do with it?
A: Two lemons and an avocado
-----signature-----
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Milkand
Title: Transfarmer
Posts:
35,284
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q: what'll you give me for this new puppy?
a: how should i know, i just work there
-----signature-----
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PallyDog
Title: WoW Vault Staff
Teh Pyckles!
Posts:
13,429
Registered:
Mar 4, '03
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Real Post Cnt: 13,007
User ID: 776,236
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Subject:
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Q. Why is there a strange smelling puddle on the floor?
A. Fifteen and it's orange.
-----signature-----
"Pallys are simply self healing rocks." - IndridCole
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Daimar
Title: Moderator
DAoC Knight - Generalist
Posts:
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User ID: 987,256
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Q: What did that hobo say to you?
A: vitamin F
-----signature-----
LGM Tailor x3, SC x3, AC x3, WC x3, Alch x3, Fletch http://gimpchimp.etilader.com/s.php?u=daimar babies cry a lot, but then they smile at you and you stop throwing them into the wall. - Goatstar
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Metal_Dog
Title: Merchant of Death
Posts:
14,215
Registered:
Feb 10, '05
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User ID: 1,026,808
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Q: Hey I need a title for this movie about a guy who invents a pill that makes everybody want to have sex with him. What should I call it?
A: The irreverent elephant is irrelevant.
-----signature-----
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Milkand
Title: Transfarmer
Posts:
35,284
Registered:
Mar 8, '05
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User ID: 1,033,879
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q: how does the irreverent elephant factor into your analysis of the test results?
a: sorry but i'm busy tonight
-----signature-----
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PallyDog
Title: WoW Vault Staff
Teh Pyckles!
Posts:
13,429
Registered:
Mar 4, '03
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User ID: 776,236
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Q: You want to meet me at the bar tonight Milk? 
A: West and little diagonally.
-----signature-----
"Pallys are simply self healing rocks." - IndridCole
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Milkand
Title: Transfarmer
Posts:
35,284
Registered:
Mar 8, '05
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User ID: 1,033,879
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Subject:
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q: who is your least favourite mod, and is your face asymmetric, respectively?
a: it was awful, i don't like to remember
-----signature-----
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Metal_Dog
Title: Merchant of Death
Posts:
14,215
Registered:
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User ID: 1,026,808
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Q: Have you ever been to Kentucky?
A: chopped, crushed, and cubed.
-----signature-----
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Daimar
Title: Moderator
DAoC Knight - Generalist
Posts:
57,526
Registered:
Nov 5, '04
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User ID: 987,256
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Q: How do you like your beets, sir?
A: Shanked it again.
-----signature-----
LGM Tailor x3, SC x3, AC x3, WC x3, Alch x3, Fletch http://gimpchimp.etilader.com/s.php?u=daimar babies cry a lot, but then they smile at you and you stop throwing them into the wall. - Goatstar
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Milkand
Title: Transfarmer
Posts:
35,284
Registered:
Mar 8, '05
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Real Post Cnt: 23,402
User ID: 1,033,879
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Subject:
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q: what was your reaction to bunking with your old roommate in prison?
a: yes but don't tell anyone
-----signature-----
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Daimar
Title: Moderator
DAoC Knight - Generalist
Posts:
57,526
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User ID: 987,256
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Q: did you really flip off that old lady?
A: it's the healthiest part
-----signature-----
LGM Tailor x3, SC x3, AC x3, WC x3, Alch x3, Fletch http://gimpchimp.etilader.com/s.php?u=daimar babies cry a lot, but then they smile at you and you stop throwing them into the wall. - Goatstar
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Metal_Dog
Title: Merchant of Death
Posts:
14,215
Registered:
Feb 10, '05
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 9,456
User ID: 1,026,808
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Subject:
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Q: You look like you parted your hair with a hatchet!
A: A bottle of tequila and a pair of handcuffs.
-----signature-----
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Daimar
Title: Moderator
DAoC Knight - Generalist
Posts:
57,526
Registered:
Nov 5, '04
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 47,007
User ID: 987,256
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Subject:
*%$(^_OFFICIAL GALAHAD GAME THREAD_^)$%*
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Q: what were the girlscouts selling?
A: extra virgin olive oil.
-----signature-----
LGM Tailor x3, SC x3, AC x3, WC x3, Alch x3, Fletch http://gimpchimp.etilader.com/s.php?u=daimar babies cry a lot, but then they smile at you and you stop throwing them into the wall. - Goatstar
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Link to this post
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PallyDog
Title: WoW Vault Staff
Teh Pyckles!
Posts:
13,429
Registered:
Mar 4, '03
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 13,007
User ID: 776,236
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Subject:
*%$(^_OFFICIAL GALAHAD GAME THREAD_^)$%*
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Q What lubricant did you use?
A Face north and real sudden like turn left.
-----signature-----
"Pallys are simply self healing rocks." - IndridCole
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GT_mrpolarbear
Title: Broverlord of the Brocean
Posts:
35,821
Registered:
Aug 9, '06
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Real Post Cnt: 36,048
User ID: 1,162,754
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Subject:
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Q: How do I get through this minefield?
A: Yes, they are real.
-----signature-----
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Daimar
Title: Moderator
DAoC Knight - Generalist
Posts:
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Registered:
Nov 5, '04
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User ID: 987,256
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Q: Are those real?
A: Because.
-----signature-----
LGM Tailor x3, SC x3, AC x3, WC x3, Alch x3, Fletch http://gimpchimp.etilader.com/s.php?u=daimar babies cry a lot, but then they smile at you and you stop throwing them into the wall. - Goatstar
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Link to this post
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Metal_Dog
Title: Merchant of Death
Posts:
14,215
Registered:
Feb 10, '05
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 9,456
User ID: 1,026,808
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Subject:
*%$(^_OFFICIAL GALAHAD GAME THREAD_^)$%*
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Q: Why?
A: The back seat of a '57 Chevy.
-----signature-----
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GT_mrpolarbear
Title: Broverlord of the Brocean
Posts:
35,821
Registered:
Aug 9, '06
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 36,048
User ID: 1,162,754
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Subject:
*%$(^_OFFICIAL GALAHAD GAME THREAD_^)$%*
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Q: What the hell just smashed through our window?
A: Count to ten then run as fast as you can
-----signature-----
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Daimar
Title: Moderator
DAoC Knight - Generalist
Posts:
57,526
Registered:
Nov 5, '04
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Real Post Cnt: 47,007
User ID: 987,256
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Subject:
*%$(^_OFFICIAL GALAHAD GAME THREAD_^)$%*
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Q: What's the fourth rule of fight club?
A: Burger sliders.
-----signature-----
LGM Tailor x3, SC x3, AC x3, WC x3, Alch x3, Fletch http://gimpchimp.etilader.com/s.php?u=daimar babies cry a lot, but then they smile at you and you stop throwing them into the wall. - Goatstar
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Link to this post
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Milkand
Title: Transfarmer
Posts:
35,284
Registered:
Mar 8, '05
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 23,402
User ID: 1,033,879
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Subject:
*%$(^_OFFICIAL GALAHAD GAME THREAD_^)$%*
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q: can anyone tell me the name of that unaired spin-off of the tv show "sliders"?
a: about two gallons a week, give or take
-----signature-----
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Daimar
Title: Moderator
DAoC Knight - Generalist
Posts:
57,526
Registered:
Nov 5, '04
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 47,007
User ID: 987,256
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Subject:
*%$(^_OFFICIAL GALAHAD GAME THREAD_^)$%*
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Q: How much heroin does Keith Richards take?
A: vacuum it up.
-----signature-----
LGM Tailor x3, SC x3, AC x3, WC x3, Alch x3, Fletch http://gimpchimp.etilader.com/s.php?u=daimar babies cry a lot, but then they smile at you and you stop throwing them into the wall. - Goatstar
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Link to this post
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GT_mrpolarbear
Title: Broverlord of the Brocean
Posts:
35,821
Registered:
Aug 9, '06
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 36,048
User ID: 1,162,754
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Subject:
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Q: What does the label on the back of that bag of anthrax say to do if it gets in your eyes?
A: About the size of an espresso cup.
-----signature-----
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PallyDog
Title: WoW Vault Staff
Teh Pyckles!
Posts:
13,429
Registered:
Mar 4, '03
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 13,007
User ID: 776,236
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Subject:
*%$(^_OFFICIAL GALAHAD GAME THREAD_^)$%*
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Q. How large is the cup of that hello kitty bra?
A. Goatstar.
-----signature-----
"Pallys are simply self healing rocks." - IndridCole
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Daimar
Title: Moderator
DAoC Knight - Generalist
Posts:
57,526
Registered:
Nov 5, '04
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Real Post Cnt: 47,007
User ID: 987,256
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Subject:
*%$(^_OFFICIAL GALAHAD GAME THREAD_^)$%*
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Q: Who will never be seen again?
A: shank him.
-----signature-----
LGM Tailor x3, SC x3, AC x3, WC x3, Alch x3, Fletch http://gimpchimp.etilader.com/s.php?u=daimar babies cry a lot, but then they smile at you and you stop throwing them into the wall. - Goatstar
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Link to this post
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GT_mrpolarbear
Title: Broverlord of the Brocean
Posts:
35,821
Registered:
Aug 9, '06
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 36,048
User ID: 1,162,754
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Subject:
*%$(^_OFFICIAL GALAHAD GAME THREAD_^)$%*
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Q: What should be done with that idiot that was siphoning gas with a leaf blower?
A: Two zebras during mating season.
-----signature-----
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Amurdora
Title: Scourge of Nsaney
Posts:
1,065
Registered:
Aug 19, '04
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 941
User ID: 957,305
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Subject:
*%$(^_OFFICIAL GALAHAD GAME THREAD_^)$%*
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Q: What do you want in your bedroom?
A: Nsaney.
-----signature-----
Amurdora
Voltagex
Amur (insert something stupid here)
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Daimar
Title: Moderator
DAoC Knight - Generalist
Posts:
57,526
Registered:
Nov 5, '04
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 47,007
User ID: 987,256
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Subject:
*%$(^_OFFICIAL GALAHAD GAME THREAD_^)$%*
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Q: What do you want in your bedroom?
A: One billion bumblebees.
-----signature-----
LGM Tailor x3, SC x3, AC x3, WC x3, Alch x3, Fletch http://gimpchimp.etilader.com/s.php?u=daimar babies cry a lot, but then they smile at you and you stop throwing them into the wall. - Goatstar
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Link to this post
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Metal_Dog
Title: Merchant of Death
Posts:
14,215
Registered:
Feb 10, '05
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 9,456
User ID: 1,026,808
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Subject:
*%$(^_OFFICIAL GALAHAD GAME THREAD_^)$%*
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Q: What did they find living in Amy Winehouse's hair?
A: It's the biggest one I've ever seen.
-----signature-----
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Amurdora
Title: Scourge of Nsaney
Posts:
1,065
Registered:
Aug 19, '04
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 941
User ID: 957,305
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Subject:
*%$(^_OFFICIAL GALAHAD GAME THREAD_^)$%*
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Q: What has my wife never said to me?
A: I got big gums!
-----signature-----
Amurdora
Voltagex
Amur (insert something stupid here)
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Link to this post
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PallyDog
Title: WoW Vault Staff
Teh Pyckles!
Posts:
13,429
Registered:
Mar 4, '03
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 13,007
User ID: 776,236
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Subject:
*%$(^_OFFICIAL GALAHAD GAME THREAD_^)$%*
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Q. Why don't you wear your dentures?
A. It was filthy and pusillanimous.
-----signature-----
"Pallys are simply self healing rocks." - IndridCole
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GT_mrpolarbear
Title: Broverlord of the Brocean
Posts:
35,821
Registered:
Aug 9, '06
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 36,048
User ID: 1,162,754
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Subject:
*%$(^_OFFICIAL GALAHAD GAME THREAD_^)$%*
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Q: How was the sex last night?
A: I herp'd, then I derp'd, then I smoked a cigarette.
-----signature-----
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Daimar
Title: Moderator
DAoC Knight - Generalist
Posts:
57,526
Registered:
Nov 5, '04
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 47,007
User ID: 987,256
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Subject:
*%$(^_OFFICIAL GALAHAD GAME THREAD_^)$%*
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Q: how was the football game?
A: Ran over a jaywalker.
-----signature-----
LGM Tailor x3, SC x3, AC x3, WC x3, Alch x3, Fletch http://gimpchimp.etilader.com/s.php?u=daimar babies cry a lot, but then they smile at you and you stop throwing them into the wall. - Goatstar
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Link to this post
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GT_mrpolarbear
Title: Broverlord of the Brocean
Posts:
35,821
Registered:
Aug 9, '06
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 36,048
User ID: 1,162,754
|
Subject:
*%$(^_OFFICIAL GALAHAD GAME THREAD_^)$%*
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Q: Doctor, how did you perform your first abortion?
A: $5.99
-----signature-----
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Amurdora
Title: Scourge of Nsaney
Posts:
1,065
Registered:
Aug 19, '04
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 941
User ID: 957,305
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Subject:
*%$(^_OFFICIAL GALAHAD GAME THREAD_^)$%*
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Q: How much did the jaywalker pay you for performing that abortion?
A: Dead puppies.
-----signature-----
Amurdora
Voltagex
Amur (insert something stupid here)
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Link to this post
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Daimar
Title: Moderator
DAoC Knight - Generalist
Posts:
57,526
Registered:
Nov 5, '04
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 47,007
User ID: 987,256
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Subject:
*%$(^_OFFICIAL GALAHAD GAME THREAD_^)$%*
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Q: what did you find in the sewer lines?
A: Like a greased pig.
-----signature-----
LGM Tailor x3, SC x3, AC x3, WC x3, Alch x3, Fletch http://gimpchimp.etilader.com/s.php?u=daimar babies cry a lot, but then they smile at you and you stop throwing them into the wall. - Goatstar
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GT_mrpolarbear
Title: Broverlord of the Brocean
Posts:
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Real Post Cnt: 36,048
User ID: 1,162,754
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Subject:
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Q: What does your mother look like when she gets off the treadmill?
A: I don't know, but there was milk all over the floor.
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Amurdora
Title: Scourge of Nsaney
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1,065
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Real Post Cnt: 941
User ID: 957,305
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Subject:
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Q: Is this a murder scene or the leftovers from a porno?
A: Norway.
-----signature-----
Amurdora
Voltagex
Amur (insert something stupid here)
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GT_mrpolarbear
Title: Broverlord of the Brocean
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User ID: 1,162,754
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Subject:
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Q: I have been feeling really stressed lately. I really think I want to kill somebody, I think that would calm me down. That or a very long vacation in a resort like facility where I could relax for a few years. Maybe both. Any ideas?
A: Down the hallway, second sdoor on the left.
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Daimar
Title: Moderator
DAoC Knight - Generalist
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User ID: 987,256
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Subject:
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Q: where can I find the qdoors?
A: A setup
-----signature-----
LGM Tailor x3, SC x3, AC x3, WC x3, Alch x3, Fletch http://gimpchimp.etilader.com/s.php?u=daimar babies cry a lot, but then they smile at you and you stop throwing them into the wall. - Goatstar
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GT_mrpolarbear
Title: Broverlord of the Brocean
Posts:
35,821
Registered:
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Real Post Cnt: 36,048
User ID: 1,162,754
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Subject:
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Q: What comes before a page?
A: A page.
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Milkand
Title: Transfarmer
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35,284
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User ID: 1,033,879
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Subject:
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q: what, in a post, hasn't this board seen the 2nd of in a long time?
a: clearly it's photoshopped
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PallyDog
Title: WoW Vault Staff
Teh Pyckles!
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User ID: 776,236
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Subject:
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Q. Is that picture photoshopped?
A. Half moon nutes.
-----signature-----
"Pallys are simply self healing rocks." - IndridCole
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Metal_Dog
Title: Merchant of Death
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Subject:
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Q: What are your favorite kind of nutes?
A: It must be a typo.
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GT_mrpolarbear
Title: Broverlord of the Brocean
Posts:
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Registered:
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Real Post Cnt: 36,048
User ID: 1,162,754
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Subject:
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Q: WTF are nutes?
A: I blame it on the dust.
-----signature-----
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PallyDog
Title: WoW Vault Staff
Teh Pyckles!
Posts:
13,429
Registered:
Mar 4, '03
Extended Info (if available)
Real Post Cnt: 13,007
User ID: 776,236
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Subject:
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Q. You didn't see that?!
A. He hasn't posted a new one.
-----signature-----
"Pallys are simply self healing rocks." - IndridCole
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