Author Topic: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
pkhere 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
surgery stents are working properly which is a good thing

Bad news...the doctor said he found a nodule in my husband's lung on cat scan pictures. This doctor said he knew it was there the last time a cat scan was done(one month after surgery). I was like...WTF, why didn't you say something!!!!!!!!

His reply was, "why would it matter, it's only grown 1 mm in 6 months and I wanted to watch it.

I WAS LIVID angry

Now he doesn't want to see my husband for a year because he is doing so well since surgery and this "nodule" "seems" to be growing very slowly.

He says it won't concern him until it gets to about 7 mm's.


I wanted to just slap him in the face.

Yes, we WILL be getting another opinion.

it was terrible...

his last words to my husband were..."I don't want to see you for a year, go and live a normal life. This may not even be cancer, I want to see how fast it is growing (if it grows anymore).

my last words to him were...

HOW CAN YOU LIVE WHAT YOU CALLED A "NORMAL LIFE" FOR A YEAR WORRYING IF YOU HAVE CANCER OR NOT!!!!!!!"

I'm sorry, I'm just so upset right now. Thanks for letting me vent here.

 

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winga 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
Edit: misread... So how big is the nodule now?

 

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_Alexandra_ 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
Time to find another doctor.

 

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pkhere 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
winga posted:
Edit: misread... So how big is the nodule now?


I know...what if it was in his freakin lung...right?

 

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pkhere 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
4 mm

he said like the size of a pea

 

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jeune 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
Sounds like he is not worried... so that is probably a good sign. Since you are worried, rightfully so, I would get another opinion.

He should of at least done a better job explaining why he was not worried about it... maybe it is something that is really common in people or something... saying I want to see it grow is a little messed up.

 

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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
I'm sorry to hear this. Definitely see a specialist soon.

Silver

 

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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
Watchful waiting is a valid medical opinion. However 3 mo / 6 mo would be better than a year for re-checking.

 

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pkhere 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
yeah this doc is a cardiovascular surgeon

we will get a referral to a cancer doc

 

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notmforce2k 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
Definitely go and get a second opinion but fwiw there are plenty of things that are left to monitor in medicine.

In cardiac care we often leave vegetations alone and/or treat with antibiotics. A vegetation is a loose or abnormal growth in the heart. If it comes loose, it can cause a stroke and kill someone. You would think it's a OMG WE HAVE TO RUSH THIS PERSON TO SURGERY AND GET IT NOW THEY COULD DIE AT ANYTIME situation but in reality it's not. We watch the growths, measure them, and often try to shrink it with antibiotics but surgery is a last resort because there are more risks associated with it than just leaving it be. Your doc should have informed you right away but don't freak out about the growth itself just yet. It's already there. Just make sure whatever doctor you go with keeps a close eye on it and you're getting other opinions (maybe from respiratory therapists or oncologists).

 

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Jezza_Belle 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
an oncologist is just going to send you back to a surgeon to have it biopsied.

Oncologists don't do the surgery themselves.

save yourself the co-pay and see another cardio.

 

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deadcactus 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
Not every lung nodule is a cancer and not every abnormal finding needs to be chased and torn down. Go get a second opinion if you need to but watchful waiting is a valid medical strategy especially since the initial 6 month period already panned out. He probably should have told you when something first popped up but it sounds like he saved you 6 months of losing your mind because you seem to be flipping your s--t even with further evidence that the nodule is nothing...

 

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FineYoungCannibals 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
maybe the doc is right and there is nothing to worry about

 

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Ferrydust 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
I am really sorry pkhere. Glad you are getting a second opinion.

 

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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
Hi Everybody!





love

 

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TickyAtack 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
I have moles that could very well become cancer sometime but I'm living normal and not in fear.

I dont see the problem.

 

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TickyAtack 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
Quick google search returns much comfort about your little lung nodule. Very common, majority not cancerous, 4mm is absolutely tiny, and the growth rate is not on par with cancer.

 

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the_great_intex 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
Moles are pretty deadly things, eventually they'll get so big you'll turn into a giant mole

I think it is good news that he isn't concerned. I was told yesterday that my tooth is so rare it could become a case study. This means I am famous

 

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Jezza_Belle 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
the_great_intex posted:
Moles are pretty deadly things, eventually they'll get so big you'll turn into a giant mole

I think it is good news that he isn't concerned. I was told yesterday that my tooth is so rare it could become a case study. This means I am famous



I've come to realize that "rare" just means they have a valid excuse to not know WTF is going on.

 

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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
I can definitely understand being freaked out by this. I really hope it's nothing.

 

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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
the_great_intex posted:
Moles are pretty deadly things, eventually they'll get so big you'll turn into a giant mole

I think it is good news that he isn't concerned. I was told yesterday that my tooth is so rare it could become a case study. This means I am famous
What's uP with your tooth?

 

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Immortal_Haze 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
deadcactus posted:
Not every lung nodule is a cancer and not every abnormal finding needs to be chased and torn down. Go get a second opinion if you need to but watchful waiting is a valid medical strategy especially since the initial 6 month period already panned out. He probably should have told you when something first popped up but it sounds like he saved you 6 months of losing your mind because you seem to be flipping your s--t even with further evidence that the nodule is nothing...




Yeah, seriously. How could someone freak out about their health when they've already had a major life threatening issue and their doctor gives them some half ass blow off about something else that could potentially be life threatening?

 

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the_great_intex 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
When I was 18 months old I fell down some stairs and I lost my baby tooth (right 23), well it hit in a way that my adult tooth came in literally bent over. The root is completely healthy and the gums extended higher up to secure it to compensate, they're not too sure why the root is still alive and how it is still attached to the tooth but I see some root guy on Thursday. I guess I could take a picture of it hmm..
http://i43.tinypic.com/sxizc5.jpg

 

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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
deadcactus posted:
Not every lung nodule is a cancer and not every abnormal finding needs to be chased and torn down. Go get a second opinion if you need to but watchful waiting is a valid medical strategy especially since the initial 6 month period already panned out. He probably should have told you when something first popped up but it sounds like he saved you 6 months of losing your mind because you seem to be flipping your s--t even with further evidence that the nodule is nothing...


 

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Jezza_Belle 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
the_great_intex posted:
When I was 18 months old I fell down some stairs and I lost my baby tooth (right 23), well it hit in a way that my adult tooth came in literally bent over. The root is completely healthy and the gums extended higher up to secure it to compensate, they're not too sure why the root is still alive and how it is still attached to the tooth but I see some root guy on Thursday. I guess I could take a picture of it hmm..
http://i43.tinypic.com/sxizc5.jpg


thats awesome, I wouldn't have it fixed unless it causes you trouble.

 

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deadcactus 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
Immortal_Haze posted:
Yeah, seriously. How could someone freak out about their health when they've already had a major life threatening issue and their doctor gives them some half ass blow off about something else that could potentially be life threatening?


I hardly call a 6 month follow-up with a new CT "some half ass blow off". Surgeons aren't known for their people skills but patients aren't known for accepting prudent medical care and well-justified conservative treatment. Only pkhere know's what was actually said so if we're just going to speculate and form an angry mob, I'm going to go the contrarian route.

If we're going to assume what happened I'm going to assume the surgeon (assuming it is a surgeon and not an interventional cardiologist) saw a small, non-spiculated, non-calcified mass on CT. He then checked with the radiologist's read to confirm that nothing about the mass' appearance was suspicious for a primary or metastatic cancer. With a insignificant radiographic finding, asymptomatic patient, and no history of concerning risk factors he moved on to caring for the patient's actual medical problems but made sure a 6 month follow-up to monitor the mass was secured.

The patient's real medical concern is resolved and at follow-up the negligible and non-concerning lesion is mentioned as an FYI. Patient's loud-mouthed wife flips out and goes off the wall before any detailed discussion can occur and the surgeon makes a hasty escape. Wife now wants to drag the patient around demanding unnecessary tests and procedures chasing a benign incidental finding and subjecting him to the constant risk of serious complications from radiographic imaging and biopsies.

Assuming is fun!

 

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the_great_intex 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
Jezza_Belle posted:
the_great_intex posted:
When I was 18 months old I fell down some stairs and I lost my baby tooth (right 23), well it hit in a way that my adult tooth came in literally bent over. The root is completely healthy and the gums extended higher up to secure it to compensate, they're not too sure why the root is still alive and how it is still attached to the tooth but I see some root guy on Thursday. I guess I could take a picture of it hmm..
http://i43.tinypic.com/sxizc5.jpg


thats awesome, I wouldn't have it fixed unless it causes you trouble.


Mega self-conscious about it sad It doesn't hurt or anything and the dentist said it isn't messing with my top teeth, so I could leave it in if I wanted to. It's also really sharp!

But it is ugly, and it is at the very front middle of my mouth so it is exposed very easily. If the root guy gives the OK I am gonna have it grinded down and crowned

 

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notmforce2k 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
Jezza_Belle posted:

I've come to realize that "rare" just means they have a valid excuse to not know WTF is going on.



Lemme tell you something. It's called "practicing" medicine for a reason. wink

More often than not, you give them your symptoms and they start going down the line of possibilities. It's not too often that doctors have lightbulb moments and know what is going on right away.

 

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Jezza_Belle 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
notmforce2k posted:
Jezza_Belle posted:

I've come to realize that "rare" just means they have a valid excuse to not know WTF is going on.



Lemme tell you something. It's called "practicing" medicine for a reason. wink

More often than not, you give them your symptoms and they start going down the line of possibilities. It's not too often that doctors have lightbulb moments and know what is going on right away.


when my daughter was a baby, her first pediatrician was a joke, she kept getting thinner and thinner as the weeks went by, even though she was eating. she was throwing up a lot, but the doctor assumed I was exagerating and it was just spitup.

After the first few months and the doctor kept saying she was fine, and *I* knew she wasn't... I took her to another doctor. I think she was around 5 months old, she was big enough that I was carrying her on my hip so she was at least sitting up on her own. I walked through the door into the exam room and before introducing himself, he said "she's allergic to milk." he took a blood test to be sure, and the following week we found out Milk, Soy, Corn and Peanut (possibly more, but he didn't want to do skin tests on that small of a child).

I guess I've been blessed with a few really great doctors over the years, even the ones that couldn't just come up with it out of the blue like that knew how to research, do testing, and come to a reasonable conclusion.

With the exception of my PCP when I had cancer (before diagnosis) who suggested that my symptoms were all in my head, and the almost year it took for a myriad of docs to diagnose my daughter's Ackerman's Syndrome (which was the "rare" I was speaking of.)

 

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notmforce2k 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
Ugh... sorry to hear you've gone through all that. sad

 

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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
Jezza_Belle posted:




Yah, I've heard about people getting bad PCP. That must have been rough.

 

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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
the_great_intex posted:
Jezza_Belle posted:
the_great_intex posted:
When I was 18 months old I fell down some stairs and I lost my baby tooth (right 23), well it hit in a way that my adult tooth came in literally bent over. The root is completely healthy and the gums extended higher up to secure it to compensate, they're not too sure why the root is still alive and how it is still attached to the tooth but I see some root guy on Thursday. I guess I could take a picture of it hmm..
http://i43.tinypic.com/sxizc5.jpg


thats awesome, I wouldn't have it fixed unless it causes you trouble.


Mega self-conscious about it sad It doesn't hurt or anything and the dentist said it isn't messing with my top teeth, so I could leave it in if I wanted to. It's also really sharp!

But it is ugly, and it is at the very front middle of my mouth so it is exposed very easily. If the root guy gives the OK I am gonna have it grinded down and crowned


that is pretty cool

 

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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
the_great_intex posted:
Jezza_Belle posted:
the_great_intex posted:
When I was 18 months old I fell down some stairs and I lost my baby tooth (right 23), well it hit in a way that my adult tooth came in literally bent over. The root is completely healthy and the gums extended higher up to secure it to compensate, they're not too sure why the root is still alive and how it is still attached to the tooth but I see some root guy on Thursday. I guess I could take a picture of it hmm..
http://i43.tinypic.com/sxizc5.jpg


thats awesome, I wouldn't have it fixed unless it causes you trouble.


Mega self-conscious about it sad It doesn't hurt or anything and the dentist said it isn't messing with my top teeth, so I could leave it in if I wanted to. It's also really sharp!

But it is ugly, and it is at the very front middle of my mouth so it is exposed very easily. If the root guy gives the OK I am gonna have it grinded down and crowned


I have a crazy tooth on the lower front, even after 4.5 years of braces it wouldn't stay where it belonged. They even tried a perm retainer, and it just popped right off. I'm just careful not to let any gunk build up and it doesn't really bother me at all, but my lower teeth don't even come close to showing when I smile, so that isn't an issue for me.

You should do whatever is going to make you feel good about it!

 

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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
deadcactus posted:
Immortal_Haze posted:
Yeah, seriously. How could someone freak out about their health when they've already had a major life threatening issue and their doctor gives them some half ass blow off about something else that could potentially be life threatening?


I hardly call a 6 month follow-up with a new CT "some half ass blow off". Surgeons aren't known for their people skills but patients aren't known for accepting prudent medical care and well-justified conservative treatment. Only pkhere know's what was actually said so if we're just going to speculate and form an angry mob, I'm going to go the contrarian route.

If we're going to assume what happened I'm going to assume the surgeon (assuming it is a surgeon and not an interventional cardiologist) saw a small, non-spiculated, non-calcified mass on CT. He then checked with the radiologist's read to confirm that nothing about the mass' appearance was suspicious for a primary or metastatic cancer. With a insignificant radiographic finding, asymptomatic patient, and no history of concerning risk factors he moved on to caring for the patient's actual medical problems but made sure a 6 month follow-up to monitor the mass was secured.

The patient's real medical concern is resolved and at follow-up the negligible and non-concerning lesion is mentioned as an FYI. Patient's loud-mouthed wife flips out and goes off the wall before any detailed discussion can occur and the surgeon makes a hasty escape. Wife now wants to drag the patient around demanding unnecessary tests and procedures chasing a benign incidental finding and subjecting him to the constant risk of serious complications from radiographic imaging and biopsies.

Assuming is fun!


Continuing your assumption (since it seems pretty typical of medical professionals in my experience):

Patient has just had a life changing (aka threatening) issue fixed and has been scared for his life. Not to mention the worry this has caused the person that loves him the most in the entire world. They go in for the follow up and he says the first event is working fine, but hey, there's a growth on his lung. He's not worried because it could be nothing. Patient and wife, who have already been extremely stressed and scared, don't understand anything other than there's something else scary that they have to hopefully get through. The doctor, who can't in good conscience tell the family that it's nothing, leaves it as a vague "we'll keep checking", which does nothing to reassure the family. Rather than sitting the family down and explaining in detail the what it could be and what it probably is so they are at least educated on the full spectrum of possibilities, he just wants to "keep an eye on it". This leaves the family in a wonderful state of worry.

The stressed, worried and scared wife freaks out because it's what people do when they're stressed, worried, and scared when they face the remote possibility that someone they love is in danger.

 

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Crafty_ac2 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
I had the same thing and a year later it was gone so hope for the best. But ya you cant help but worry.

 

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Anebriated 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
if anything, maybe the doctor could have done a better job explaining things to people with over a decade less education. being ignorant about the current best medical thinking about cancer doesn't stop people from thinking they know what is scary /feeling scared.

 

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deadcactus 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
Immortal_Haze posted:
Continuing your assumption (since it seems pretty typical of medical professionals in my experience):

Patient has just had a life changing (aka threatening) issue fixed and has been scared for his life. Not to mention the worry this has caused the person that loves him the most in the entire world. They go in for the follow up and he says the first event is working fine, but hey, there's a growth on his lung. He's not worried because it could be nothing. Patient and wife, who have already been extremely stressed and scared, don't understand anything other than there's something else scary that they have to hopefully get through. The doctor, who can't in good conscience tell the family that it's nothing, leaves it as a vague "we'll keep checking", which does nothing to reassure the family. Rather than sitting the family down and explaining in detail the what it could be and what it probably is so they are at least educated on the full spectrum of possibilities, he just wants to "keep an eye on it". This leaves the family in a wonderful state of worry.

The stressed, worried and scared wife freaks out because it's what people do when they're stressed, worried, and scared when they face the remote possibility that someone they love is in danger.


Like I said, I'm just offering a contrarian opinion. The reality is that communication almost certainly broke down on both sides of the discussion. As I said, surgeons aren't known for their interpersonal skills but patients have an equal role in maintaining proper communication and it's ridiculous how quickly that responsibility is forgotten.

There's material for another rant on the failure of our culture to appreciate the value and validity of doing nothing versus doing something but that's a long one...

 

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pkhere 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
Called the family doc. He wants the report sent to his office.
Thanks to the posters who feel the same or close.
We did read about them on the internet, but is still scary when something like that is going on inside a loved ones body.

Try to imagine if it was yourself, your spouse, your kid, or another close family member.

Heh, it sounds like nothing to some, but I am pretty certain anyone else posting here would feel pretty freaked out to if they were in this situation.



 

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CulenTrey 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
My 90 year old Grandpa just had a mass discovered. The doctor at the VA told him to come back in a year and my family was just as upset as I imagine you are PK... The doctors logic was (basically an assumption) that his heart is too weak for surgery, so we need to monitor progression and then he could estimate life expectancy. It was ultimately a death sentence with a timeline.

The prognosis was unacceptable.

After a 2nd opinion at an actual hospital (I hate the VA) he'll undergo surgery next week, which is admittedly risky, but weighing a slow degenerative death against a risky surgery was a no-brainer. I'm still hoping he outlives all the other WWII vets and is the last man standing! praying

 

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Sith_Mauler 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
_Alexandra_ posted:
Time to find another doctor.

 

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Mangler_SC 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
FineYoungCannibals posted:
Hi Everybody!



love
Hi Doctor Nick!

 

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Jezza_Belle 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
CulenTrey posted:
My 90 year old Grandpa just had a mass discovered. The doctor at the VA told him to come back in a year and my family was just as upset as I imagine you are PK... The doctors logic was (basically an assumption) that his heart is too weak for surgery, so we need to monitor progression and then he could estimate life expectancy. It was ultimately a death sentence with a timeline.

The prognosis was unacceptable.

After a 2nd opinion at an actual hospital (I hate the VA) he'll undergo surgery next week, which is admittedly risky, but weighing a slow degenerative death against a risky surgery was a no-brainer. I'm still hoping he outlives all the other WWII vets and is the last man standing! praying


Don't be so fast to do the surgery, there are huge risks (can you even fathom how risky for a 90 year old?).

My cousin died today, he went in to have a tumor removed from his brain, the surgery went well until he had two massive strokes which caused bleeding in his brain, and irreparable brain damage. He was in a coma for several days and they pulled the plug this morning. He was only 44 years old, and in very good physical health otherwise.

Get a third opinion

 

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Immortal_Haze 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
deadcactus posted:
Like I said, I'm just offering a contrarian opinion. The reality is that communication almost certainly broke down on both sides of the discussion. As I said, surgeons aren't known for their interpersonal skills but patients have an equal role in maintaining proper communication and it's ridiculous how quickly that responsibility is forgotten.

There's material for another rant on the failure of our culture to appreciate the value and validity of doing nothing versus doing something but that's a long one...


Your point has a great deal of value and you're right, I can only assume how things went. Like you said, many (I would actually extend that to doctors outside of family practice) surgeons aren't known for their people skills. As I've gotten older, I've made myself way more assertive when around doctors. If I feel they're talking too technical, I hound them until they give me an explanation that I can understand. If I feel they're rushing, I'll keep asking them questions until I'm satisfied that I have enough information to deal with the situation. I'm not stupid, but I'm not a doctor so I don't know what a lot of medical stuff means. I think people (patients and their loved ones) often feel too self-conscious to get all of the information because they don't want to look dumb to the doctor. I feel that when I'm dealing with a major health issue, I want to know what's going on in terms I can understand.

That knowledge directly helps your second point, which is understanding that doing nothing can be the best course of action. I think people freak out about doing nothing because they don't understand exactly what's going on - which can be fixed by communication. That communication varies from a doctor that will sit with you until you say "Nope, no more questions" to one you have to follow around the hospital. But you're right - you have an equal amount of responsibility to get that information as the doctor does to give the information.

 

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Hardcore_Hibby 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
see this pretty much everyday...

both sides of the coin.

Working in radiology in the hospital can be so much fun...

I'm glad I can say, "I'm not the Dr. you'll have to wait to talk to them for the results."

 

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deadcactus 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
CulenTrey posted:
My 90 year old Grandpa just had a mass discovered. The doctor at the VA told him to come back in a year and my family was just as upset as I imagine you are PK... The doctors logic was (basically an assumption) that his heart is too weak for surgery, so we need to monitor progression and then he could estimate life expectancy. It was ultimately a death sentence with a timeline.

The prognosis was unacceptable.

After a 2nd opinion at an actual hospital (I hate the VA) he'll undergo surgery next week, which is admittedly risky, but weighing a slow degenerative death against a risky surgery was a no-brainer. I'm still hoping he outlives all the other WWII vets and is the last man standing! praying


That or a salaried surgeon with no reason to needlessly cut open your grandfather gave you a realistic assessment of the situation. You decided you didn't like reality and shopped around until you found someone happy to take the money regardless of the rather significant risk your grandfather now gets to spend his final days on some tubes in the ICU instead of at home in relative comfort and surrounded by loved ones. Good luck, I hope your take on it is closer to reality...

 

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Ordal 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
Sounds rough, sorry.

 

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Anebriated 
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Subject: Husband's doctor's appointment had some good and some bad news...
I enjoy reading about memory and how flawed it is. it is interesting to know that rephrasing a question can change how it is answered (see Elizabeth loftus). memory and even vision are constructions whose purposes are better served by being efficient and current than 100% accurate. if you've stared at an optical illusion then you know already that your vision is a bunch of unconscious inferences that can be easily fooled. it is equally amazing how emotions play a role in shaping your memories as you (reconstruct) recollect them. my hippocampus being awash in alcohol, i can't give you details or grammar. But, you should know how fking far away you are from reality. you don't know it directly, there is an organ called the brain between you and it. your head is full of symbols and representations, not the reality of the outside world. so question everything, because you can.

 

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