VN Boards Archive

[VN Boards Archive]

Welcome to the Vault Network forum archive.

This is not a complete archive, time didn't allot us the opportunity to properly backup the majority of the boards deemed "expendable". Most boards on this list have at least 20-40 pages archived (non-logged in pages, 15 topics per page).

Popular boards may have as many as 250 pages archived at 50 topics per page, while others deemed of historical signifigance may be archived in their entirety.

We may not agree with how the board shutdown was managed, but we've done what we could to preserve some of its history in lieu of that.

Please enjoy the archive.
~ Managers, Moderators, VIP's, and regular posters.

Author

Topic: 3 religious leaders and a sasquatch

ineenia Posts: 5,191 Registered: Nov 1, '05 Extended Info (if available) Real Post Cnt: 4,871 User ID: 1,090,042	Subject: 3 religious leaders and a sasquatch
	A Catholic Priest, a Baptist Preacher and a Rabbi all served as Chaplains to the students of Northern Michigan University at Marquette in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan . They would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk shop. One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't really all that hard, a real challenge would be to preach to a sasquatch. One thing led to another, and they decided to do an experiment. They would all go out into the woods, find a sasquatch, preach to it, and attempt to convert it to their religion. Seven days later, they all came together to discuss their experiences. Father Flannery, who had his arm in a sling, was on crutches, and had various bandages on his body and limbs, went first. 'Well,' he said, 'I went into the woods to find me a sasquatch. And when I found him, I began to read to him from the Catechism. Well, that sasquatch wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of God, he became as gentle as a lamb. The Bishop is coming out next week to give him first communion and confirmation.' Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, had one arm and both legs in casts, and had an IV drip. In his best fire-and-brimstone oratory, he exclaimed, 'WELL, brothers, you KNOW that we Baptists don't sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a sasquatch. And then I began to read to my bear from God's HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I quickly DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as a lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus. Hallelujah! The Priest and the Reverend both looked down at the Rabbi, who was lying in a hospital bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IVs and monitors running in and out of him. He was in really bad shape. The Rabbi looked up and said: "Looking back on it, ....circumcision may not have been the best way to start..." -----signature----- If their stupidity didn't shelter them from the full shame of their actions,their would be alot more republican suicides.
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Ptilk Title: Creepy old pirate Posts: 50,658 Registered: Feb 13, '02 Extended Info (if available) Real Post Cnt: 48,530 User ID: 645,124	Subject: 3 religious leaders and a sasquatch
	-----signature----- (none)
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Moe_Nox Title: In Moe We Trust Posts: 22,319 Registered: Feb 4, '07 Extended Info (if available) Real Post Cnt: 19,181 User ID: 1,203,840	Subject: 3 religious leaders and a sasquatch
	-----signature----- The Nanny State cometh Currency should be bacon cheeseburgers and blow jobs... - Reese Life at the Outpost: http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1771556
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Tych2 Title: Obama Appointed Outpost Czar Posts: 40,411 Registered: Mar 1, '05 Extended Info (if available) Real Post Cnt: 33,378 User ID: 1,032,223	Subject: 3 religious leaders and a sasquatch
	-----signature----- We have enough youth. What we need is a fountain of smart. Drill Anwar! Kapie Drevid in Tanks
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ZartanAround Title: Torpid Curmudgeon Posts: 13,775 Registered: Feb 6, '04 Extended Info (if available) Real Post Cnt: 11,365 User ID: 892,117	Subject: 3 religious leaders and a sasquatch
	-----signature----- what are nice chickens like you doing in a coop like this?
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__Bonk__ Posts: 53,947 Registered: Jul 25, '09 Extended Info (if available) Real Post Cnt: 53,339 User ID: 1,364,654	Subject: 3 religious leaders and a sasquatch
	-----signature----- I keep my eyes fixed on the sun! A change in feeling is a change in destiny.
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Mastara Posts: 8,982 Registered: Dec 29, '04 Extended Info (if available) Real Post Cnt: 8,312 User ID: 1,011,569	Subject: 3 religious leaders and a sasquatch
	didnt read... but anyway -----signature----- Boooooommmm Heeeaaaddddshhhhooooottttt! http://www.carellaross.com/img/truth_its_the_new_hate_speech.jpg Mastatheimposta - 10L2 SB Merlin
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