Modeeb
Title: A Ghost In The Machine
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Twenty Six Things The Movies Taught You...
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"1. Large, loft-style apartments in New York City are well within the price range of most people--whether they are employed or not.
2. At least one of a pair of identical twins is born evil.
3. Should you decide to defuse a bomb, don't worry which wire to cut. You will always choose the right one.
4. Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communications system of any invading alien society.
5. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts: your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.
6. When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your bedroom will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish.
7. If you are blonde and pretty, it is possible to become a world expert on nuclear fission at the age of 22.
8. Honest and hard-working policemen are traditionally gunned down three days before their retirement.
9. Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their arch-enemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gasses, lasers and man-eating sharks, which will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape.
10. All beds have special L-shaped cover sheets that reach the armpit level on a woman, but only to waist level on the man lying beside her.
11. All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French bread.
12. It's easy for anyone to land a plane, providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down.
13. Once applied, lipstick will never rub off--even while scuba diving.
14. You're very likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.
15. Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German or Russian officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German or Russian accent will do.
16. The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris.
17. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating, but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.
18. If a large pane of glass is visible, someone will be thrown through it before long.
19. If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noises in their most revealing underwear.
20. Computer monitors never display a cursor on screen but will always say: "Enter Password Now."
21. Even when driving down a perfectly straight road, it is necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments.
22. All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they're going to go off.
23. A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.
24. If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you meet will know all the steps.
25. Police departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.
26. When they are alone, all foreign military officers prefer to speak to each other in English."
From a handout in my experimental writing class
-----signature-----
"What is here is there. What is not here is nowhere." Vishvasara Tantra
"Ever tried, Ever Failed. No matter. Try Again.
Fail Again. Fail Better. Samuel Beckett
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__Bonk__
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Twenty Six Things The Movies Taught You...
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27. Car chases always hit at least one fruit stand
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I keep my eyes fixed on the sun!
A change in feeling is a change in destiny.
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Modeeb
Title: A Ghost In The Machine
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Twenty Six Things The Movies Taught You...
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Alright, Bonk good idea. Let's make up some.
28. Ancient Romans are best played by the British.
-----signature-----
"What is here is there. What is not here is nowhere." Vishvasara Tantra
"Ever tried, Ever Failed. No matter. Try Again.
Fail Again. Fail Better. Samuel Beckett
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Tych2
Title: Obama Appointed Outpost Czar
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Twenty Six Things The Movies Taught You...
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29) The red shirt will never make the end of the episode.
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We have enough youth. What we need is a fountain of smart.
Drill Anwar!
Kapie
Drevid in Tanks
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Derasio
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Twenty Six Things The Movies Taught You...
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30.) Every englishman to ever live in America was educated at Eton and then Oxbridge, or is so cockney it must almost be physically painful.
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hmmmm
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Halloweve
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Twenty Six Things The Movies Taught You...
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31) The black guy always dies first.
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(none)
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Ashmaele
Title: Pastor of Muppets
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Twenty Six Things The Movies Taught You...
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32. Prostitutes are always attractive, disease-free and have hearts of gold.
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I had a dream. It was an incredible dream. When I awoke, I had a huge mess to clean up. 
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Ashmaele
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Twenty Six Things The Movies Taught You...
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Mo I hope your writing teacher gave proper credit!
http://www.in70mm.com/news/2002/humor/25_things.htm
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I had a dream. It was an incredible dream. When I awoke, I had a huge mess to clean up.
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Modeeb
Title: A Ghost In The Machine
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Twenty Six Things The Movies Taught You...
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Of course he did. I just could not find it.
-----signature-----
"What is here is there. What is not here is nowhere." Vishvasara Tantra
"Ever tried, Ever Failed. No matter. Try Again.
Fail Again. Fail Better. Samuel Beckett
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Ashmaele
Title: Pastor of Muppets
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Twenty Six Things The Movies Taught You...
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A corrupt cop or politician will typically keep actual video of himself being bought off on his work computer, which will be password protected by the name of a key plot point in the movie.
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I had a dream. It was an incredible dream. When I awoke, I had a huge mess to clean up.
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Ashmaele
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Twenty Six Things The Movies Taught You...
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During all police investigations it will be necessary to visit a strip club at least once.
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I had a dream. It was an incredible dream. When I awoke, I had a huge mess to clean up.
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ZigmundZag
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Twenty Six Things The Movies Taught You...
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Passwords and electronic keys can always be hacked by a program that randomly guesses all the characters and then displays the individual characters as they match.
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"Take the cheese to sickbay!"
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Kid-Yeti
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Twenty Six Things The Movies Taught You...
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33. A standard issue military hand grenade has enough explosive power to wipe out a small neighborhood.
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Ashmaele
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Twenty Six Things The Movies Taught You...
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Bartenders either know every single customer and what type of beer they like or perhaps they only offer one brand of beer at every single bar. ("Give me a beer")
-----signature-----
I had a dream. It was an incredible dream. When I awoke, I had a huge mess to clean up.
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Ashmaele
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Twenty Six Things The Movies Taught You...
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The nerdy chick at school is always really hot, once you remove her glasses and frumpy sweater. Yet somehow, a whole school full of hormonal teenage boys couldn't see this.
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I had a dream. It was an incredible dream. When I awoke, I had a huge mess to clean up.
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