Author Topic: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
Additive-Free 
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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
I usually just browse and read on the game side, then my wife and I were having a discussion about problems my 10 and 12 y/o daughters came to me with and I remembered these were here...

My ex-wife has entered into a relationship with someone else, and has decided to live an...."alternate lifestyle" with him. That's not a problem for me, at least it wasn't until my kids came to me and wanted to know what to do about the bruises they saw on mommies back that new bf had put there. He is staying there alone with them at night, and after a little investigation, I have found that he has anger issues, and believes that a good outlet is leaving bruises. My ex has willingly accepted this, but my concern is my 2 little girls. I have told them both that if he touches them in any way to call me, and that I would be calling 911 otw there...Is there anything more I can/should do?

 

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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
contact a lawyer and tell him what is going on. if you feel they are in danger, and do nothing, and something happens, you will be held accountable. he will also, but so will you, and you may not get the kids.

let ppl know.

 

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Additive-Free 
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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
What about my local DFACS office?

 

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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
i would tell them also.

 

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Additive-Free 
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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
Thanks for the fast reply, sucks that its a long weekend and there's nothing I can do bout it till Tuesday angry

 

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pkhere 
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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
if you tell your lawyer and your lawyer calls her lawyer...you just may get custody if you don't already have it

hope it all works out happy

 

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myxomatosis8 
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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
I wouldn't care if he's touching my kids or not, I wouldn't want them to be around that sort of situation, and to somehow start thinking that maybe it's not that ABnormal for this type of thing to happen, that sometimes it's ok for people to hurt each other...

Psychologically damaging even if they aren't being physically assaulted, IMO.

 

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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
did you get a hold of ppl today? what did they say?

 

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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
I was in a bad part of GA all day and had no signal yesterday, but I talked to my DFACS office today, it would be funny if not so scary. The lady said in 23 years she had never heard of a situation like this, and had no idea if they could even do anything. She is going to take it to her supervisor today and call me tomorrow.

It turns out this is a fetish for my ex and her bf, and she has posted pics to a website for ppl like her, and my kids have seen some of them. When my 12y/o asked about them my ex explained it as the 2 of them "playing".

 

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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
be sure to let that lady see those pics. and make sure she understands the kids have seen them also and are asking questions.

 

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Additive-Free 
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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
Just checked the website, and, lol, my ex has taken her incriminating pics off....too bad I already SS'd, and DL'd to a to a flash drive.

 

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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
good for you!

 

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Darwynnia 
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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
While I support the right of people to do as they wish in their bedroom - leave the kids in the dark. When they're old enough, they'll figure it out on their own regarding BDSM, they don't need it broadcasted.

Hell, my daughter is 20 and no idea that her mom's a bit....pervy.

 

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Additive-Free 
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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
Finally got a call from DFACS....the lady said that the law considers that to be something that happens behind closed doors, and unless the kids see him hit her, then nothing can be done. Just because they saw the bruises and they both admitted to it to my girls doesn't matter.....guess a lawyer is the next step.

 

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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
geez



ok good luck on that then.

 

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pkhere 
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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
get the lawyer


good luck

 

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Darwynnia 
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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
Additive-Free posted:
I was in a bad part of GA all day and had no signal yesterday, but I talked to my DFACS office today, it would be funny if not so scary. The lady said in 23 years she had never heard of a situation like this, and had no idea if they could even do anything. She is going to take it to her supervisor today and call me tomorrow.

It turns out this is a fetish for my ex and her bf, and she has posted pics to a website for ppl like her, and my kids have seen some of them. When my 12y/o asked about them my ex explained it as the 2 of them "playing".


1) If the pictures of your ex feature her fully clothed (ie: nips & nethers covered) and aren't pornographic, they won't be seen as 'damaging'. Chances are good that your kids have seen MUCH worse on the internet already if they're over 10. Most websites which deal with kink/fetishes (for example, Fetlife.com) are normally member only. There might not be a fee for membership, but they cover their asses legally.

2) "People like her" - there's a lot of 'people like her' in the world - having a fetish does not make one a freak, nor does it make one an abuser/abusee. Your ex explained it like anyone with a 'kink' does - playing - because that's what it is. Being able to express your sexuality shouldn't be a crime for anyone.

 

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myxomatosis8 
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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
Maybe the kids have seen the pictures on the computer or something, with no need to go to any members-only website...

I'm sorry, but the kids shouldn't be exposed to this type of thing. My feelings on what they do together aside, there shouldn't have been any way the kids should have been able to find and see pictures of their mother doing this stuff, FFS.

 

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Additive-Free 
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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
In a very sad and bad twist of fate, I now have custody of my 2 girls...Not the way I wanted, but their mother, at 32 y/o, had an almost fatal stroke 230am Sunday morning. She was rushed to the hospital, and has been in and out of it since then. According to the doc's, what happened to her was what they see in ppl that are 80+. The only thing I'm thankful for about this whole situation is that she was with him and not the kids, otherwise they would've found her dead on her bedroom floor...

On another note.....


Who knew that chloroform was a controlled substance, and when found with it in your possession you go to jail.....Too bad someone had some when he shouldn't have.

 

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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
is it just temporary until she recovers?

how are the kids? they doing ok?

do they know and understand what happened?

how do they feel about it?

 

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Additive-Free 
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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
It will not be temp, the doc's are saying due to the severity she will never be able to live alone or take care of herself, much less 2 kids. They have given her all kinds of tests and can't figure out where the clots are coming from, and drilled a hole in her skull to relieve the pressure that was building on her brain-stem.
The kids are....shocked and scared and worried, but I'm relaying all the info as I get it from their grandmother and the doctors. They know what happened, and they know what a stroke is as well. My mother had 1 in Feb. of last year, and I called my dad, and he talked to them about it as well. Being a preacher-man, he knows how to talk TO kids and not AT them. I'm doing all in my power to make sure they know how much I love them and how much she does, but at the same time its hard not to give them false hope.

 

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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
sounds like you are doing all the right things.

 

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Darwynnia 
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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
Additive-Free posted:

Who knew that chloroform was a controlled substance, and when found with it in your possession you go to jail.....Too bad someone had some when he shouldn't have.


That's interesting, because chloroform (trichloromethane) isn't on any controlled substance schedules. It's an industrial solvent and used in different chemical processes. I've used it in DNA extraction, and am able to order it without filing any paperwork for controlled substances.



 

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Additive-Free 
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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
Darwynnia posted:


That's interesting, because chloroform (trichloromethane) isn't on any controlled substance schedules. It's an industrial solvent and used in different chemical processes. I've used it in DNA extraction, and am able to order it without filing any paperwork for controlled substances.






According to my local Sheriff's Office its considered to be in the same class as coke

 

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Darwynnia 
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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
Additive-Free posted:
Darwynnia posted:


That's interesting, because chloroform (trichloromethane) isn't on any controlled substance schedules. It's an industrial solvent and used in different chemical processes. I've used it in DNA extraction, and am able to order it without filing any paperwork for controlled substances.




According to my local Sheriff's Office its considered to be in the same class as coke


Cocaine is a Schedule II Controlled Substance.

You can read the entire USC 21 Chapter 13 here: http://uscode.house.gov/download/pls/21C13.txt I've taken the liberty to cut/paste the Schedule II drugs below:

SCHEDULE II.

(A) The drug or other substance has a high potential for abuse.

(B) The drug or other substance has a currently accepted medical use in treatment in the United States or a currently accepted medical use with severe restrictions.

(C) Abuse of the drug or other substances may lead to severe psychological or physical dependence.

SCHEDULE II.

(a) Unless specifically excepted or unless listed in another schedule, any of the following substances whether produced directly or indirectly by extraction from substances of vegetable origin, or independently by means of chemical synthesis, or by a combination of extraction and chemical synthesis:

1. Opium and opiate, and any salt, compound, derivative, or preparation of opium or opiate.

2. Any salt, compound, derivative, or preparation thereof which is chemically equivalent or identical with any of the substances referred to in clause (1), except that these substances shall not include the isoquinoline alkaloids of opium.

3. Opium poppy and poppy straw.

4. coca leaves, except coca leaves and extracts of coca leaves from which cocaine, ecgonine, and derivatives of ecgonine or their salts have been removed; cocaine, its salts, optical and geometric isomers, and salts of isomers; ecgonine, its derivatives, their salts, isomers, and salts of isomers; or any compound, mixture, or preparation which contains any quantity of any of the substances referred to in this paragraph.

(b) Unless specifically excepted or unless listed in another schedule, any of the following opiates, including their isomers, esters, ethers, salts, and salts of isomers, esters and ethers, whenever the existence of such isomers, esters, ethers, and salts is possible within the specific chemical designation:

5. Alphaprodine, Anileridine, Bezitramide, Dihydrocodeine, Diphenoxylate, Fentanyl, Isomethadone, Levomethorphan, Levorphanol, Metazocine, Methadone, Methadone-Intermediate, 4-cyano-2-dimethylamino-4, 4-diphenyl butane, Moramide-Intermediate, 2-methyl-3-morpholino-1, 1-diphenylpropane-carboxylic acid, Pethidine, Pethidine-Intermediate-A, 4-cyano-1-methyl-4-phenylpiperidine, Pethidine-Intermediate-B, ethyl-4-phenylpiperidine-4-carboxylate, Pethidine-Intermediate-C, 1-methyl-4-phenylpiperidine-4-carboxylic acid, Phenazocine, Piminodine, Racemethorphan, Racemorphan.

(c) Unless specifically excepted or unless listed in another schedule, any
injectable liquid which contains any quantity of methamphetamine, including its
salts, isomers, and salts of isomers

Nowhere in the code does it list Chloroform.

Nor does it list formyl trichloride, methane trichloride, methyl trichloride methenyl trichloride or TCM (all commercial names for chloroform).

Again; it's a commonly used solvent which is commercially available. If it were a controlled substance like you suggest it is, you wouldn't be able to purchase it from a chemical supply catalogue.

 

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myxomatosis8 
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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
Now I know this is a troll. Had my suspicions with the OP, but gave that the benefit of the doubt.

Hell, we have a bottle of chloroform here at home. Not a controlled substance, obviously. You know what it's good for? Attaching plexiglass to itself. Yeah it's really cool, it sort of melts the plastic. Really useful stuff when you are 14 and making napkin holders in shop class! Everyone else screwed the base to the bent part to hold the napkins, my Dad hooked me up with the good stuff.

Smells nice too, not that I'd go inhale a ton of it...

 

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Additive-Free 
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Subject: I dunno if this is the right place or not....
As i said, it's according to my local S.O., never looked into it myself. Really didn't care until I found out they had it around my kids...1st thing that popped into my head was the Casey Anthony stuff.

 

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